And Tochi Says… Whose thoughts are YOU thinking?

Day in, day out (or night in, night out, depending on what you do for a living), most of us give the best of our talents, skills, creativity, time, energy and attention to create wealth and value for someone else. For those who do not want to take responsibility for their own lives, that is okay; but for the rest who find this status quo dissatisfying, what do we do about this state of affairs?

Many of us have accessed tens, if not hundreds, of self-help resources that have told us what to do about it. We already know what Oprah has said about it. We already know what our religious or spiritual leader has said about it. We personally know what we should do about it. But what keeps us from doing what we need to do – to start the necessary work on the very things that provide meaning and joy and value to our own lives?

I believe that many of us don’t want to pay the price, whatever that price might be. We just don’t feel motivated to do what is imperative for us to do. It is too painful. It will be too painful. That is the bottom line. It is much easier to talk about it, read about it, write about it, preach to others about it, design strategies about it, set up projects about it… everything but do something CONCRETE about it. We don’t want pain; we do want gain, but NO PAIN, PLEASE!

So, we rationalize. Personally, I’m ashamed to admit that I’m an expert at this myself. We point to luck, connections, good fortune, money, &c. as the reasons why others make it and we don’t. We know and are not too happy at working toward someone else’s agenda, but we avoid the pain of doing something about it. We know that our lives are slipping away; we know that we could die any day, any time; yet, we dither. ‘Something’ will rescue us, and make everything all right in the end.

In a previous blog, I wrote about scuttling our safety ships. This still applies. I have also written about facing reality as it is; this also applies. Believe me, even I go back and read my own articles whenever I’m trying to avoid the pain of working on my own priorities because I know it is imperative to change how I think in order to change how I live.

This is the thought: If, at the end of your day, you are feeling tired, drained, unhappy, resentful and frustrated, could it be that you know on the inside that you are using your best to work on someone else’s priority? Instead of your own? No matter how you slice it, not working on YOUR own stuff will come back to haunt you sooner or later. Resolve today – no, this very minute – to identify, schedule and pinpoint exactly when you will start on your own priorities, no matter how humble they may be. Take what you need; no one will hand it to you just like that. This is how you get your life back. That’s how I’m getting MY life back.

The image used in this post is courtesy of the contributors to Creative Commons. I am immensely grateful.